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The floor is covered in wrapping paper, under the tree is already bare, and the children were happily engaged with all their new gifts… for approximately 25 minutes. As parents we felt frustrated after the time, thought, and money into buying, wrapping, and stating up way to late for the children to not fully enjoy the lesson Christmas could teach them.
A few years ago on a whim we decided to put Christmas in the hands of our children.
We decided to do a gift exchange with our children, and it has changed the atmosphere of what “the season of giving” means through in a real, tangible way. What started on a whim a few years ago has turned into a tradition our family (children especially!) look forward to.
If prompted our children could still recall who they given gifts to and what they bought each other over the year the last few years!
We don’t do this in addition to a bunch of gifts from mom and dad; we do this instead of buy each of our children a bunch of stuff. We buy a “family gift” as our gift to our children- one that everyone can enjoy.
As a mother of six now, I have to say our children look forward to guessing who they will get, hoping who will get them, and (sometimes) bummed when they get the same person, again.
1. Learn to Give
Doing a gift exchange with our children has a been great joy to watch! They get excited to look over their person’s wish list and deciding what they want to give them. We also encourage them to think about what kinds of activities they enjoy and how their person spends their free time.
2. Learn to Budget
This comes easier as the kids start to learn money concepts and subtraction. It’s a “real world” example of money, along with learning about tax and shipping costs. It also opens up conversation about the best use of the budgeted money and how many different ways they could spend it.
3. Learn to Receive
Sometimes the gift they are really excited to give just isn’t received well. We understand it is part of the process of giving gifts. On the flip side, they learn to receive gifts a little more understanding on how to receive gifts graciously.
4. Have Joy for the Season
The excitement of choosing the gift(s), the wrapping party, seeing wrapped gifts under the tree and knowing they had a part in all of it —- the gift exchange is strings together happiness and joy through the holiday season.
5. Care and Thoughtfulness
Gift wrapping day is probably the most fun day for them! They get all their supplies, go to separate rooms, we hand out everyone’s gifts, and we blast Christmas music!
They all take great pride and planning how to wrap their gifts and add their own special touches before we put them all under the tree. (Special ribbon, drawing, craft, etc!)
Gift Exchange Rules:
- Everyone’s name goes into the hat — dad all the way down to the baby. One at a time we pull names. After everyone has chosen, we double check no one has their own name. This year some on did, so we switched with the baby (mom and dad obviously help the youngest children shop for their person).
- Dad chooses the highest price for the gift exchange. Then everyone else gets to choose a number below dad’s. One person gets to draw the price tag. Some of the children are getting older, so now tend to stay close to dad’s number 😉
- Unfortunately, we still have young children, so we have yet to have true “secret santa” gift exchange…. one day!
- Everyone makes a list, but we have explained that we aren’t required to use it.
- Decide when and how we are planning to shop (all online usually!)
- Pick a “Wrapping Day” and write it on the calendar. Everyone gets their gift (as they come in the mail I sort them into a labeled box for each person. On wrapping day they get scissors, wrapping paper, and tape. We turn on Christmas music and go to different parts of the house to wrap gifts! We then place them under the tree…. and of course peek at our own gifts and have a bit of fun of trying to guess our gifts.
- We unwrap Christmas Day, from youngest to oldest, as we each give our gift to our chosen person.
If you are looking for a more enjoyable Christmas morning that your children will not only cherish but look back with fond memories, I hope you think about creating a different kind of Christmas this year.
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